this post was submitted on 16 Jun 2024
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Aside from valve probably having a hit by bus plan, I'm pretty sure ownership of valve is actually split pretty evenly so it will likely fall to another senior dev who understands what to do.
I've heard they've hidden three immeasurably invaluable CS:Go Knife skins throughout the platform, and the first person to find all three will unlock Half-Life 3 and annoint the winner as Gaben 2, God Emperor of Valve and owner of Steam. Also, they get a chocolate factory.
Oompa loompa, doompadee doo, We’ve got a perfect riddle for you, Oompa loompa, doompadee dee, If you are wise, you’ll listen to me.
Three precious knives, in Counter-Strike they hide, Find them all to claim your prize worldwide, The first to collect, in triumph shall stand, To unlock Half-Life 3, the game so grand.
Oompa loompa, doompadee doo, Follow the clues and you’ll be through, Oompa loompa, doompadee dee, Just one more knife, and then you’ll see.
A crown awaits, a throne so high, Steam’s vast empire, you'll rule the sky, With Half-Life 3, your reign begins, All hail the gamer who truly wins.
Oompa loompa, doompadee doo, The ultimate prize belongs to you, Oompa loompa, doompadee dee, Gaben 2, you shall always be.
I hope it pleases you to know I sang this entire song to myself