this post was submitted on 29 Aug 2023
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[Outdated, please look at pinned post] Casual Conversation

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Not talking about being with one partner at a time. Talking about the idea of finding "the one" and being with them your whole life.

50% divorce rate. 97% of people (in the US) don't wait till marriage, so most of us have multiple sexual partners prior to the one we stick with. Many have children with more than one partner.

How can anyone look at the world and think, yeah, there's one that's meant for everyone and just one?

Also hope I don't come across disrespectful. If you do believe in monogamy, I am interested in hearing from you. I'm just buzzed and thinking about my own love life and being curt

Edit: Speaking to the idea that it's the "natural order" or default. Not that it can't work in individual circumstances, especially when we've been programmed for decades

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[–] anewbeginning@lemmy.world 12 points 1 year ago (7 children)

Just because you don't see it around you doesn't mean it doesn't exist. I'm from Portugal which has even higher divorce rates, and yet 90% of couples I know got together and stayed together and have absolutely stable family lives. The idea that it cannot be done(unless it's done with no effort) is the main reason most couples fail to do it.

[–] DudePluto@lemm.ee 2 points 1 year ago (3 children)

I don't believe that it can't be done, it obviously can. There's just this idea that it's the natural state, or what humans are instinctively given to, and that just seems... incorrect?

[–] Rocinante@lemmy.one 1 points 1 year ago

What are you relying on for natural state? Other animals? They kill off other competitors. If humans let instincts guide their actions then there'd be more violence with emotions driving decision making than brains.

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