The kids are alright

Gaza has been struck by renewed airstrikes from the passive voice, media outlets are reporting. It comes just days after Lebanon suffered hundreds of new casualties at the hands of the grammatical device.

“Thousands of civilians in Gaza have been killed” one newspaper reported, while another noted that “Houses have been bombed and lives have been lost”. Others described how Palestinians had been “found dead”, “shot at”, “cleared” and “displaced”. Another newspaper reported that “Violent protests leave dozens dead”.

John Briggadon from the Subeditors Society, said the passive voice is one of the most violent entities the world has ever seen. “It is ruthless. It is responsible for countless deaths, bombings, airstrikes, starvations, displacements and casualties. It has killed millions of people. Or, should I say, millions of people have been killed by it”.

Media outlets denied overusing the passive voice. “We don’t publish the headlines; the headlines are published,” one media group clarified.

Another case of cat loving leftists bringing down the number of pure, white babies being born.

This is what happens when you disrespect the Swiftie nation.